Friday, March 4, 2011

Downer Alert!

Tough evening for me.  Most likely because I'm tired and it's Friday and I no longer have work to distract me.  Was thinking about everything I have to do this weekend and the realization of just how much all of our lives are going to change has overwhelmed me.  But mostly, I'm just so sad that my dad is no longer the man that takes care of his daughter, gives her advice and makes her feel secure.  The roles are now reversed.  And I admit that I'm a little scared.  Scared I'll be impatient or show my frustration too easily.  Scared I'll make my mother regret moving closer to me.  And scared I'll make wrong decisions for them when they no can longer make their own.

But for now, I'll concentrate on my father.  His heart is still in there.  He still has his smart-aleck sense of humor.  And for the most part, when I'm there, he knows who I am.  So I will embrace those moments and enjoy the time I spend with him and my mother.